The Good Listener

Regardless of the love you and your child have for each other, unless you both develop good communication skills, your relationship will not be as strong as it could be.  To be a good communicator, you must develop two very specific skill sets: speaking and listening.

We all learn how to talk, so this is the easier of the two skills to develop and use. The second, listening, is not as easily learned.

To help your child deal with any issue, he/she must believe he can talk to you about anything and you will more than just hear them talking, you will actually listen.

How you respond to your child is determined not only by what you hear but also your understanding of what is being said. Without a clear and thorough understanding of what your child is saying, you will not be able to respond correctly.

The first thing you need in listening to your child is a loving, caring relationship. Unless they are absolutely positive that you care, they will be reluctant to share anything with you. Listening is usually what they need most.

Listed below are the characteristics of a good listener. Study them! Learn them! Use them!

  1. Make eye contact with your child, but don’t stare.
  2. Smile a lot while you are listening.
  3. Every now and then, nod your head to show you understand what he/she is saying.
  4. Help them label their feelings.
  5. Summarize what your child has said to you.
  6. Never make your child regret that he they have shared their feelings or opinions with you by laughing or being critical or harsh.

By becoming a good listener, you will encourage your child to come to you for help about anything.

Additional help can be found in this book – Talking, Listening, Connecting by Paul M. Rosen, Ph.D.

Happy Communicating!!

Post to Twitter Tweet This Post

1 comment to   
The Good Listener